Learning to be silent

In the midst of chaos God is my refuge and calm. The last few days have found me "hiding" from the world a bit. Maybe I feel a little shell shocked, maybe I'm not ready to face reality, maybe I just needed to be invisible...whatever the reason, God has allowed me this time. Now, it seems, he is making me ready to move.
Sometimes it isn't easy to be silent. In the last weeks I have found that sometimes silence is necessary. Silence can give the mind and soul a rest. It gives the chance to hear things I might otherwise have missed. It allows God a chance to speak. It is really amazing how God is sending me the messages and encouragement I need most right now. Today he reminds me that silence is needed and is important.

The Need for Silence

It is always easier to add to the noise of the world than to be silent. Silence is a very precious thing--"There was silence in heaven about the space of half an hour" (Rv 8:1 AV), when the seventh seal was opened in the Book of the Revelation. Thunder and horses and martyrs and earthquakes had preceded the opening of this seal. Hail, fire, blood, and fearful judgment followed it--but in between, angels stood in the presence of God and there was utter silence.

Have we learned to stand in God's presence, mouths shut, hearts open? "Lord, what do you want me to do?" We must be quiet in order to know Him and to hear Him and to hear Him answer us.

"If any of you lack wisdom let him ask his friends." No. That is not the Word of the Lord. "If any of you lack wisdom let him ask of God" (Jas 1:5 AV) is his Word to us. There is a place for asking wisdom of godly friends, but let us always go first to God.

"Be still"--that is, shut up--"and know that He is God" (Ps 46:10 AV).

Answers begin to come...

I have not always depended on God the way I should. It is easy to say, "Here, Lord, take my problem." I, however, struggle with leaving the issue in His more than capable hands. Getting impatient that things aren't happening on my timeline, I sometimes try to "help" and things go awry. Sometimes I struggle with giving God the problem in the first place, thinking whatever it is might be too trivial for the God of the universe.

This summer God has been showing me alot about both of those things. He wants to take care of me and my issues. I NEED to seek Him and His grace. Receiving His grace is also part of the equation.

Now a bump has appeared in the road. Instinct screams to fight or to give up. Instead, it seems I am to wait. So...wait I shall. God is in control. I repeat that over and over. Instead of running head-first into the fray, I wait for God and His instructions. He is the director. I am concerned about the situation yet at peace.

He will let me know His plan when it is time and He will make the path clear. When and where he instructs, I will follow.

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It is one thing to serve on boards and committees that handle the affairs of others; it is quite another to make decisions that affect us personally.

It is not a sacrifice to the Lord if we give of that which costs us nothing.

"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise" (Ps. 51:17).

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The Necessity to Cover


There are things which it is our duty to cover in silence. We are told nowadays that everything ought to be expressed if we are truly "honest" and "open."

Proverbs 11:13 says, "He who goes abroad as a talebearer reveals secrets, but he who is trustworthy in spirit keeps a thing hidden."

Jesus sometimes refused to reveal the truth about Himself, even when it would have seemed to us "an opportunity to witness." He did not always answer questions. He did not always say who He was. He told some of those He healed to tell no one about it.

"For every activity under heaven its time...a time for silence and a time for speech" (Eccl 3:1,7 NEB). "A man of understanding remains silent" (Prv 11:12 RSV).

Lord, deliver me from the urge to open my mouth when I should shut it. Give me the wisdom to keep silence where silence is wise. Remind me that not everything needs to be said, and that there are very few things that need to be said by me.

What I need to do right now...(watch, wait and pray)

Watching Quietly, Praying Silently

The man whom Abraham sent to find a wife for his son Isaac had been long in Abraham's service. No doubt he had learned much of trust and obedience through watching his master walk with God. He set out on his mission, confident that God would help him.

Beside the Well of Aram of Two Rivers he halted his camels and was praying silently when a beautiful young woman appeared with her water jar on her shoulder. She responded to his request as he had prayed she would, and he watched quietly to see whether the Lord had made his journey successful (Gn 24:21).

Very possibly we often miss what God wants to show us because we don't take time to pray silently and watch quietly. It was by doing those two things, along with the obvious practical things (let us not leave those undone) that the servant was able to say, "I have been guided by the Lord" (Gn 24:27 NEB).

Thoughts and lessons for today...

Our Enemy is always looking for opportunities to control our lives. Where he cannot stir us up to revolt against God, he will seek to make us careless so that before we realize what is happening we are dominated by our fallen natures.

"For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?" (Mark 8:36).

Advice to take to heart

So, stuff is going on...again. I am trying to seek God's will and gudiance in all things. The latest trial is very frustrating. I feel totally defeated. God has used amazing people, though, to encourage me. I am so thankful for friends. I want to take the situation and place it in God's hands...let Him work it all out. That is a hard thing for me. Letting God work and trusting Him isn't always easy. I don't know why but I want to give it to Him and then try to "help". OF course, when that happens things turn disasterous. Things are happening and I want God's peace. There are choices that will have to be made and I want to heard God's voice...his instruction in what to do next. This is a learning process for me. I feel like I'm standing on the edge and can't see what is "out there" and that's scary. I know God wants me to put my life in his hands and let him support and guide...it is going to be an interesting and lesson filled ride.

In the mean time...I found this quote this morning. I never cease to be amazed at how God sends messages when his children need them (and the instruments his sometimes chooses to use!)...

Meditate. Live purely. Be quiet. Do your work with mastery. Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine.
-Buddha

What I'm convicted about today...

A Devious Repentance

Recently I committed a sin of what seemed to me unpardonable thoughtlessness. For days I wanted to kick myself around the block. What is the matter with me? I thought. How could I have acted so? "Fret not thyself because of evildoers" came to mind. In this case the evildoer was myself, and I was fretting. My fretting, I discovered, was a subtle kind of pride. "I'm really not that sort of person," I was saying. I did not want to be thought of as that sort of person. I was very sorry for what I had done, not primarily because I had failed someone I loved, but because my reputation would be smudged. When my reputation becomes my chief concern, my repentance has a hollow ring. No wonder Satan is called the deceiver. He has a thousand tricks, and we fall for them.

Lord, I confess my sin of thoughtlessness and my sin of pride. I pray for a more loving and a purer heart, for Jesus' sake.

Continued lessons from FSU

God has been teaching me so much lately. These last 5 weeks have been full of experiences and lessons...and many of these weren't in the classroom! It is as if God has been breaking through some of the walls I had so carefully constructed around various parts of myself and is healing old hurts. This hasn't been an easy process, by far. I've felt out of sorts and confused; however, God is in control...and that is all I need to know.

The following is what he showed me today:

An Antidote for Pride

The basis of all sin of whatever kind is pride. This was what inspired the disobedience of Adam and Eve, and it is always with us. One very common form it takes is the pride of privilege. When a man is given a special position, he forgets that it was given. He becomes proud, as though "his own arm" had gotten him the victory.

God knows well the heart and made provision for this sin of pride when He instructed the Israelites about appointing a king. He was to make a copy of the law. This would be the antidote, necessary for him and likewise for all of us (for "law" read "Word"). "He shall keep it by him and read from it all his life, so that he may learn to fear the Lord his God and keep all the words of this law and observe these statutes.

In this way he shall not become prouder than his fellow countrymen nor shall he turn from these commandments to right or left" (Dt 17:19, 20 NEB). The attempt itself to keep the commandments, one by one and day after day, will be sufficient to humble us, for the "straightedge of the law" (Rom 3:20 JBP) will only show us, as Paul found, how crooked we are. We will find, in fact, that we cannot keep it. "The whole matter is on a different plane--believing instead of achieving" (Rom 3:27 JBP). Pride won't find much foothold on that plane.

"The real test of being in the presence of God is that you either forget about yourself altogether or see yourself as a small, dirty object. It is better to forget about yourself altogether" (C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity).

When God Says No

I've been learning about sometimes God saying 'no'. This is a hard lesson for me. Like so many people, I want things to go my way. Yeilding to God's desires for me is sometimes difficult; however, it is a refuge to know that He is in control. While I cannot see the reasons for staying in a situation (like CRHS) I can rest in the fact that He is working all things together for His good...


2 Samuel 7:1-13

Nathan commended David for his desire to build a temple and then went to his own house. That night God spoke to the prophet, and as an obedient servant, Nathan brought the word to David. The message was no.

God was not going to allow David to build a house of worship for Him. The Lord, however, was pleased with the intentions and the attitude of David's heart in this matter.

Years later, after David's death, Solomon built a magnificent temple and in his dedication message said, "It was in the heart of David my father to build an house for the name of the LORD God of Israel. And the Lord said unto David my father, Whereas it was in thine heart to build an house unto my name, thou didst well that it was in thine heart" (I Kings 8:17,18).

Though God said no to David's building a temple, He was so pleased with David's attitude that He made a covenant with him in which He promised to establish the house of David forever.

Can you take a no from God? He knows what is best for all of us. Remember, His promise to David was "I will be with thee for ever" (see 2 Sam. 7:16). This promise is ours also, for He has said He will never leave us nor forsake us (see Heb. 13:5).

"As for God, his way is perfect" (2 Sam. 22:31).

The seed that is me

To see things in the seed, that is genius.

-Lao-Tzu

Thank you, Lord, for seeing something in the seed that is me. Thank you, also, for the nurturing, tending, and (even though it can be painful) the pruning you do to help me to grow in your grace and wisdom. Let me have deep roots planted firmly in you and branches that reach tall and strong toward you.

What God showed me today...

My Own Fault

Someone who is suffering as a result of his own foolishness or failure may read these words. These griefs are hard indeed to bear, for we feel we might easily have avoided them. We have no one to blame but ourselves, and there isn't much consolation there. Sometimes we imagine that we must bear this kind of trouble alone, but that is a mistake. The Lamb of God, slain for us, has borne all of our griefs and carried all of our sorrows, no matter what their origin. All grief and sorrow is the result of sin somewhere along the line, but Christ received them willingly. It is nothing but pride that keeps me from asking Him to help me to bear the troubles which are my own fault.

Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world, take away mine.
I take Him at His word indeed,
Christ died for sinners--this I read--
And in my heart I find a need
Of Him to be my Savior.
(Dora Greenwell)

Loving the world...

To love the world in the wrong way is to love it without knowing the Father's love. It is when a man knows Him and receives everything from his hand that the world is redeemed for him, no longer a snare and in opposition to the love of God. I must love the world only through and because of the Father, not instead of. My ultimate concern must be God Himself. He is eternal. His gifts are not always so.

Lord, may no gift of yours ever take your place in my heart. Help me to hold them lightly in an open palm, that the supreme object of my desire may always be You and You alone. Purify my heart--I want to love You purely.

lesson for today...

"The love of Christ leaves us no choice....His purpose in dying for all was that men, while still in life, should cease to live for themselves" (2 Cor 5:14,15 NEB).

No other choice but love. Cease to live for yourself. Live for Christ. Don't bother singing, "Oh, how I love Jesus" as long as you are plotting retaliation. You don't really have that choice, not if you're a Christian.

another installment of : What God showed or taught me today...

Yesterday's victory is not sufficient for today. We must have a moment-by-moment walk with the Lord so that when each testing comes, we will be victorious for Christ.

You therefore, beloved, knowing this beforehand, be on your guard so that you are not carried away by the error of unprincipled men and fall from your own steadfastness" (2 Pet. 3:17, NASB).

Today is the first day...

Well...God has placed something on my heart and I'm listening.

I've been wanting to get back into shape. I'm tired of feeling pudgy and out of shape. While here at FSU I've been eating well and I'm taking my thyroid meds every day. I realized I was going to have to do more. While praying about what that might be, God kept putting joggers/runners in my path. Dad has been jogging for years. Jimmy has been jogging (and even runs marathons and has done triathlons!). Anji started running in January and her husband, John Ventry, started jogging recently. My roommate, Hannah, runs daily and is training for a marathon in January. My wonderful new friend, Eric, jogs. So...OK LORD! I get the picture...I will get on the bandwagon and start jogging. When I got home today I changed and went to the fitness center at the condo. I walked (at a pace of 4 mph) for 20 min. on a treadmill and then rode a stationary bike for 20 min. (at about 10 mph). I feel pretty good...so far. Tomorrow, I'll do more. I hope to build up to jogging fairly quickly and then build from there.

It's interesting, too, how many of these people are all training for a marathon at Disney in January. They don't know one another; however, they will all be running the same race. Is God pointing me in that direction as well???

So today...it the first day for a new me. Prayerfully, God gives me the strength to commit to this and make it a part of my life.