This life

My mother-in-law is terminally ill with cancer. She has been in a nursing home for about 3 weeks now. Her decline in that time has been awful to witness. She doesn't even look alive right now. They say she isn't in any pain but isn't that just because they have her meds set so high? She sleeps almost all of the time. They say she eats almost nothing each day. She is having trouble with the most basic things, like swallowing. When I went to sit with her today I saw they had started giving her oxygen. She doesn't know I'm there. One of the aids said they were surprised she was still 'with us'...Honestly, I am too. I know she wouldn't like being like this. It was so painful to just sit and know there was nothing I could do but pray...So I did. Her brother, Ken, says she/we should be celebrating....Embracing this next 'phase' of life. How can one celebrate a woman who is wasting away from this illness????? She can barely move. He also said we could have a miracle and she could recover...I know and believe God could do this if he choose to, but I don't think this is going to happen in this case. He went on to talk about how she would have to deal with morphine addiction then. All I could think at this was...WHAT?!?!?! If she was to beat this there would be so much more than a morphine addiction to deal with. Ken 'fussed' at my husband for cleaning out "Mom's" home and getting ready to put it up for sale (again, with the what if she lives???). We are trying to be realistic. Doing this cleaning right now while she is 'alive' is a bit easier on Tom. Having something to do is helping him as well. When she goes it is going to be so hard for him. They had an odd relationship; however, as he has said, she is his mother. When she dies, I know he will feel alone. His step-dad died when he was about 16 and his grandfather died when he was 12 or so. His beloved grandmother died in May 2004 and he has no siblings. He did/does have a couple of step-brothers; however, they were never really close and really maintained no relationship after his step-dad passed away. He has an aunt, but she has never been close to either him or his mom (her sister). Actually, his mom and his aunt don't get along at all...never have from what I've been told. Otherwise there is Ken, the uncle. I've never met him. Tom likes him OK but he does get so frustrated by him. Maybe Ken thinks he is being supportive and helpful but it isn't. I feel like we are in such limbo. I don't know what I should do...
On another topic. I hate it when something innocent is made to be something wrong. I got 'accused' of something that isn't true. There isn't an good/easy way to fix the problem so I just get to sit and wait and pray...and kick myself for being stupid. I try to do the right thing and then it goes wrong.....grrrr. I just hope the thing is allowed to go away and nothing more is made of it, which would just make things worse! I did what I could to make the wrong right as best as I could. If I can just get through the next 4 weeks, I get a vacation and that may be the best thing of all.